Language is one of my favorite things about culture. One of the most beautiful parts of language, to me, is people’s names. Names, and naming conventions, are fascinating. They can provide so much information about the culture, if you know where to look, or how to ask. For example, did you know that in Yoruba “Olu” means “God” and “Tosin” means “worthy to be served”? A strong religious culture could explain why I have met so many Nigerians with “olu-” in their names and other words that reflect on the praise of God.
Names are important because they are such an important part of who we are. My name is as simple as Sara, but people who don’t take the time to notice that and instead add an ‘h’ which drives me crazy. Honestly, it’s the simplest thing to look at my name in the sender field or my signature line and simply. Write it. Correctly. But people can’t be bothered to. I can’t imagine if I had a name that was ‘difficult’ to pronounce in the West and it was constantly butchered. It’s a basic sign of respect to pronounce someone’s name because, like I said, it’s such an important part of who we are–it can be a big part of our identity.
Allow people to introduce themselves
I’m still working on this. When a student comes in for an appointment I like to say, “Hi, Name! How are you?” But sometimes I don’t get the name right. (If it’s a name I’m certain that I don’t know how to say, then I just say hi. But if it’s something I think I know, I’ll say it.) For example, when I greeted a student named Cato the first time and then asked if I said it right, the student explained that it is “cuh-toe”. The name Laker seems obvious; however, it’s not “lay-ker” but “luh-kay”.
What I try to do when I meet someone from the first time (if they do not automatically say their name) is say, “Hi, I’m Sara. What’s your name?” This empowers them to tell me the correct way to say their name so they don’t have to go through the whole meeting answering to an incorrect version.
Just ask
There is absolutely nothing wrong with asking, “How do you pronounce your name?” Sometimes people feel embarrassed about asking, but I’ve never understood why. You can’t be expected to know every single thing, and it’s good to have the confidence to ask when you don’t know something. For the most part people are pleased when you actively try to pronounce their names correctly. Even if you don’t get it right, the fact that you try means a lot. I learned that the Ghanaian Twum is pronounced “tchoom” and the Chinese Zhu doesn’t rhyme with “zoo” but actually “joo”.
Phonetic pronunciation
All offices have a way to store student names and notes. (It would be crazy not to store this information, amiright?! But lo and behold, I did indeed work for one office that did not in fact have a list of all of their students outside of SEVIS and did not have advising notes. Anyway…) You can store the phonetic pronunciation there so that you and other advisors can see it when looking at the student’s info.
If you have a document (image below) where you store advising notes, then next to the student’s name at the top of the sheet in parenthesis add the phonetics.
If you have a spreadsheet master list (image below), add a new column with the phonetics.
If you are lucky enough to have a record management system (image below), there should be a data entry field where you can decide what to use it for.
Of course, the downfall with this method is that people might interpret the phonetics differently, especially if you’re in an office that has people from different language backgrounds. How I naturally pronounce vowels is going to differ from a native Spanish speaker, for instance.
Audio recording
You can use a service that allows students to record their name. There are all sorts of services (SayMyName, NameDrop, NameCoach, and more) that I myself have not tried but want to if given the opportunity. If I were to do this, I’d ask the students to submit it before orientation so that when I’m working with their documents, like issuing I-20s or emailing new student communications, I will start saying their name correctly and associating it with the spelling. To use this on a mass scale your office might have to pay for a subscription which may be cost prohibitive based on dwindling operating budgets. However, if you can partner with another office on campus, for example Diversity & Inclusion or whichever office coordinates commencement (who hasn’t heard names butchered at graduation?) you might be able to cost share and provide a useful service across campus.
I hope these ideas help you feel confident in asking for names! I’d love to know if there are any other tips or tricks you use in your practice or office.
Thanks for stopping by,
Sara